December 7, 2021 - The Grief Journey

Today marks two months since Shari left this world for Heaven.

I have learned a lot during this brief journey with grief, but feel I have much more to learn. It is harder than I ever imagined. Someone in an attempt to ease the pain told me that losing a loved one was like having an arm or leg amputated and adjusting to living without it, but continuing to live. For me it feels more like my life was split in half and now trying to live with half of what is left. I’m not sure if either are an accurate analogy, and I intend no criticism to the one that shared that illustration with me. This journey through grief at times still takes my breath away and there are still times the tears flow without warning. I still wake up almost every morning and say “good morning gorgeous” and end most days with a “good night my love” both common greetings that I shared with Shari almost daily. I still send her an occasional text message, not sure if messaging rates apply in Heaven, but it helps the ache in my heart when I do. I have yet to meet anyone that says this journey is easy or one who has found the end.

So we all keep walking, some days with more strength and vigor, other days a little more slowly and with a few more tears. But I still find each day, each step, each second that God is faithful!!! He always has been and He always will be.

God’s faithfulness is the first constant in this journey, the other is the support of family and friends. I have always sought to value the people God has placed in my life, family, friends, acquaintances; I am so very thankful that God created us to do life with others. During this season those relationships have been invaluable. The support of family, friends and even at times “strangers” has been incredible. I don’t think we can navigate this grief journey well without others in our lives. We might be able to get by on our own, but I think the pain would be much more difficult to bear.

We need people in our lives who are okay when we fall apart, people who will give of themselves to be there for us as we journey through grief, people who will walk that road by our side, even when they cannot understand the depth of the pain.

We are not looking for people with “the answers” because there are no answers for what makes our hearts grieve and ache. If you are going to love and be loved deeply, which is the only real option to living life the way God intended it to be lived, there will come a time when you will grieve deeply. I would rather love and be loved deeply and face the grief than to have not experienced giving and receiving love.

Every day is a great day, but every day has its challenging moments. Keep loving and being loved and be one of those friends that is willing to come alongside of someone who has a broken heart and just walk with them. You don’t need to worry about what to say, sometimes it is best to just simply be quiet and be present. And don’t take those relationships for granted!!!

With much love and appreciation!!!

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